Sore

Yeah I know I may have hurt you but does that make this okay?

I see your coping mechanism and it ruins my day

But I'm afraid to stand up for myself

Afraid of what I'll say

So I find myself slowly fading away

118 new messages

199 missed calls

After all that time spent on the

Phone trying to help you get through it

Trying to ease the fall

I did what was best for me

And in the end you'll see it was best for both of us

I'm a mess

I'm broken

But you are too

We are separated

To be fixed to new

So don't make me the villain

Just 'cause we weren't meant to be

That's not down to my control

I had to leave

You don't know how long it took me to block you

I found it hard so don't act like I was never good to you

I felt like I was trapped

Forced to stay

But I had friends that told me that it was not okay

So I left before it got too much

I wasn't prepared for when you made the first punch

I said I wanted space but you wouldn't give up

Made it harder for yourself but it would never be enough

'Cause what went on between us

Seemed fine

Until I looked a little closer

And saw the inside

I chose to lose you

To save myself

To stop me being someone else

I thought I was strong

But you knew more

I'd been manipulated

Left brain dead

And sore

What I didn't want to do

Was start a fight

Because you know that's not me

You know that's not right

But I felt like I had no choice

I'm still stuck under your shadow

Screaming for a voice

But it came

It's here now

I'm speaking out

I'm not playing the victim

I'm out and proud!

It maybe wasn't toxic

But I know you're not blind

And I know you know deep down that there was bad times

So go on

Ask for me back

Do it again and again but don't expect me to crack

I've grown, you've seen it

More than ever

So take credit for that

I don't

It's whatever

You may think I've finally got what I want to

(Thought I was strong)

But you're just looking at what I've achieved

I was there for you before

(But you were stronger)

But this one? It's for me

I chose to lose you

To save myself

To stop me being someone else

I thought I was strong

But you knew more

I'd been manipulated

Left brain-dead

And sore

I know you're listening

And I know it hurts

You've got to be strong

You've got to learn

I left because I needed to and you told me you knew that

So if you ever really loved me this is how you prove that

When I say I needed time

I'm telling you I meant that

I'm broken

I'm fixing myself

I hope you understand that

I know I lost you

To save myself

I'm not becoming someone else

I know that I'm strong

But you know more

I felt manipulated

Left brain-dead

And sore